We all know Clay Aiken is a dance music icon. Now we can finally see his first dance music video!

Feast your eyes upon the best thing to happen to music videos, ever. EVER.

Honda, they can make robots with classical music training and cars for douchebags to modify.

Ashley Harkleroad was defeated in the first round 6-4, 6-3 by some French chick. Hairy armpits should never defeat Grade A American ass, this is will not be tolerated.

This is what Europeans picture when they think of the American family.

Lindsay, we've already seen your crotch. Let's see your boobs! Oh wait, we've already seen those, too.

Apparently she wasn't aware this was an audition for a very serious athletic competition that involves cannon-propelled tennis balls.

Heidi and Spencer embody all of our hopes and dreams.

American Idol is finally over. Now I can get beck to my normal life of listening to non-crappy music.

Mariah Carey married Nick Cannon without a pre-nup, which means he presumably could steal this sweet Teen Choice Awards surfboard and like a bajillion dollars.

Paula Abdul screwed up and now everybody knows that American Idol is fake!

The epitome of the American Dream in 2008.

Or does Paula have a Flux Capacitor?

Who said music sucked in the 80s? It was a revolutionary time for fog machines and throat guitarists.

His cellmate was heard whispering in his ear, "I'm gonna do to you, what you did to rap music".

American Idol's David Archuleta giggles like the most adorable child/bitch ever.

Invisible musical laser beams are the future.

Winner of the international Ms. South Carolina award.

The award for Best Supporting Bodyguard in a Paparazzi Photo goes to “guy fondling his walkie-talkie with his eyes closed.”

Lindsay Lohan probably will mimick Marilyn Monroe's life in every way, other than the respected film career, which Lohan has replaced with Razzie award winning film career.