Watch as these girls totally lose it over Dave Archuleta losing on American Idol. And by "lose it" I mean GO BANANAS.

For reals footage of Sarah Palin in a swimsuit during her 1984 Miss Alaska beauty pageant.

Ashley Harkleroad was defeated in the first round 6-4, 6-3 by some French chick. Hairy armpits should never defeat Grade A American ass, this is will not be tolerated.

This is what Europeans picture when they think of the American family.

Apparently she wasn't aware this was an audition for a very serious athletic competition that involves cannon-propelled tennis balls.

Heidi and Spencer embody all of our hopes and dreams.

American Idol is finally over. Now I can get beck to my normal life of listening to non-crappy music.

Paula Abdul screwed up and now everybody knows that American Idol is fake!

The epitome of the American Dream in 2008.

Or does Paula have a Flux Capacitor?

American Idol's David Archuleta giggles like the most adorable child/bitch ever.

What's more American than a 222 lb. cheeseburger?

It's your turn to beat the crap out of those judges from American Idol.

American Idols should be thin and beautiful, not fat and radish haired. Boo Fantasia, boo.. And I don't mean the term of endearment.

Just what Americans need, more reasons to sit on their ass and watch TV. Who wants cheese waffles!?

There are no words to describe this beauty. It's like looking into the sun and hearing the words, "My dad never took me fishing when I was a boy, this will teach him".

Wow Christina, you look so flawless! What a natural beauty, unlike like those other woman who cake on their make up.

Most of the middle east is hot, dull and colorless. What makes you think a terrorist would suddenly jump ship and start decorating things with pretty lights?

In theaters 11-20-07. Patti Petalson (Blair) struggles with the pressure of becoming the next important American writer.

There's nothing that will get writers back to work quicker than the threat this possible "TV show" poses to the American psyche.