Barack is never going to give you up until you finally vote for him.

The audio of a man calling 911 because Subway messed up his sandwich. Where was Jared during all this?

Trying to get laid? Well, then you might want to get some better pick-up lines than these guys.

If your options are dynamite and something else, always choose dynamite. It blows stuff up.

Bragging to your friends is serious business. Here's the 3rd episode of our new Machinima series. Brought to you by the U.S Army.

This is payback for all the instructors that made you drive to pick up their laundry.

Clearly this guy is just fed up with pulling all the weight in a communist society or something, (It's Just Not Fair!).

Foreign people really know how to mess up a perfectly horrible television theme song, don't they?

You can't find Jesus if you don't find Lil' Markie first. (Hint: he shows up about a minute into this video, May The Mullet Be With You)

This would open gaming up to a different, more "flamboyant" demographic.

Further proof that bullies never grow up, they just get uniforms.

A TV station in North Carolina could not wait to show the highlights of the Duke game so they recreated the game using dolls. Reason #653 to hate Duke.

Daniel Plainview drinks your milkshake Bayside, he drinks it up.

His friend asked him what he'd do for a Klondike.

If anything sums up Bud Light drinkers it would be the fact they'd rather breathe fire than date a model, win the lottery, or create world peace.

Tonight on Fox News, "Skateboards causing small explosions, is this alternative sport safe for your child? Coming up next after Mass Effect: Sex Party, Special Report."

When reporting on bird over population, always look directly up with your mouth wide open. That's where the real story is.

So bike racing is kind of like Nascar in spandex, bigger the crash the better.

What goes down must come up?

Next up Audience Hero, you just sit, drink beer, and stare.