Say what you will about the state of music in 2007, there is no doubt that this does not help.

Tracy Morgan is a non-stop comedic genius; he combines the jokes of a 12 year old with the delivery of an alcoholic like no other.

No son, that's just a transvestite.

Conan's hair may be the color of fire but he is not going to stop his show and flee for safety just because of a fire alarm.

There's no special effect quite as special as a catfight.

This is the perfect storm. Lady midgets should not be bullfighters as we all know no bull can resist their charm...

If there ever was a home for an ugly modeling agency, its jolly ole England. No shortage on broken noses and ugly teeth there. Think Winehouse has a contract?

No one should ever be penalized for leaving the ice and completely leveling their opponent. If anything they should rewarded for making hockey watch able.

Prison is a lot like school; you hang with your buddies, have recess, and eat crappy food. The upside is the food is better; the downside is the corndogs have no sticks.

Are you as revolted by the Meg White Sex Tape as this reporter is? We hope so.

Mary-Kate Olsen is now starring in Weeds. She once starred in Full House. Here the two characters meet for the first time.

In an alternate universe there is no world hunger and Lohan and Tyra Banks did not become cracked out whores. Enjoy this clip from when the dream was still alive.

In this commercial for hair gel in Japan, Orlando solves an amazing number of problems with just his hair. Unfortunately there is no way to reclaim dignity...

Ted Nugent's three favorite things in no particular order are guns, music and ignorance. Music never came into the picture except for "Cat Scratch Fever".

This commercial has the catchiest song, written in Oklahoma, about BBQ, ever. Making "it falls off the bone" sound sexy is no small task.

These used car guys are such cheap bastards, they have no problem swearing at you.

A dog got run over by one of the bikers in the Tour de France! O noes!!! (The dog was uninjured.)

Somehow these girls agreed to sit on the merry-go-round while these guys spun it with a scooter. And no, it doesn't end pretty.

I can't imagine the number of painstaking hours it took to set this Goldberg-esque contraption throughout this house. This guy obviously doesn't play MMORPGs.

Chrisopher Blue has apparently been soaked in booze. Was he drunk during his session? No, BUT every review I have read about him compares his songs to Tom Waits and says he has “blues-soaked vocals.” I dunno about all that, but I do know this is one helluva performance. Watch it…now!