Oksana Pochepa is the Russian pop star who's allegedly banging Mel Gibson. We salute you, Mel Gibson. Girls who don't speak English are sexy.

1) Why the hell would anyone buy a magazine with Zac Efron on the cover? 2) Why would anybody buy GQ if this is the stuff they're gonna put on covers? And 3) You clicked on a picture of Zac Efron and that means you're gay.

Yes, Anna Kournikova is looking at your love handles and thinking she definitely doesn't want to bang you.

You so want to bone Audrina's bones, don't you?

What does Anna Kournikova's tattoo mean? That you can never bang someone as hot as her.

Amy Winehouse, if you're going to flash us, makes sure we're blind first.

Oh Katy, you're just forcing us to want you really, really bad.

Love or hate her, you all want to bang her.

We totally couldn't beat the crap of Rihanna, though we tried.

Oh, how can you accuse a face like that of committing genocide?

We like the fact that some girls are just known for having slutty big boobs.

We don't know whether Kanye West's girlfriend, Amber Rose, is bangable or not. What do you think?

If you turn your back on this elephant he'll totally bone you.

(rollover the picture to reveal the shocking conclusion to this picture's title!)

We're sorry for ever making fun of you, Jessica. We mean it this time. You're not fat. You're not a lardass. You're amazing, and so are your boobs. They are what makes you amazing. Long live Jessica Simpson, long live her boobs.

Here's a couple pictures of Audrina that will hopefully convince you to lose weight and/or get boob implants to prepare yourself for spring break.

Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.

Here's are some of the models in the 2009 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. As you can probably imagine, they are all horrendously hot.

Brazilian model Sheyla Hershey supposedly has the biggest breasts in the world. They're triple KKK, which we didn't even know existed. You think these are hot?

Basement Horse is always watching you.