Now shut up.

We like it when Linday Lohan tries on shoes. And so do you.

Just kidding. We don't know if Lohan does meth, she probably doesn't. But we certainly know she has a meth face, which is the WORST kind of face if you're going to have any face at all.

It doesn't even make sense to hate Clooney these days because you will never topple his ability to score the greatest looking females on the planet. Just accept it and move on. We've been studying Buddhism, dudes. You can stare at Elisabetta Canalis forever if you want to. But for us, it's time to chillax. Later.

Both of these Battlestar beauties can be found in the latest Maxim magazine, which we guess is still around and trying to make you horny.

Mad Men star Christina Hendricks married someone this weekend. Not this guy though; he's just somebody with a cool mustache. Anyway, this picture should remind you that her new husband is probably the luckiest man alive. So is mustache man for standing next to her.

Uhhhhhhhhh?

You people are crazy.

And if you're nice she might even show you that she's wearing no panties.

Here's an alleged screen shot of the Jimmy Kimmel sex tape. It's okay if you don't believe it exists, because it probably doesn't. We hope it doesn't.

Never was there such a beauty in all the land. Lindsay Lohan, apple of our stinkeye.

If you look really close you can see her penis.

She's still hot with or without clothes.

You really have to think before you post. Never forget that, fools.

We just found the perfect pillow.

But she wants to spit in your face first.

Dude, you are so doing it wrong.

If you're going to show up at the Emmy's pregnant, I guess you might as well show up REALLY pregnant and just freak everybody out.

Christina: You have boobs. Show them.

If you interrupt Barack during a session of congress he will slice off your hand.