Her butt makes us want to cry happy tears just to know something like it exists in this horrible world.

Here's Marisa wearing a 3 million dollar bra from Harlequin Fantasy Bra. Tell us: how did her boobs get so rich that they're able to afford such a luxury? I mean, all they do is just sit there and look awesome. Not fair!

Her hips are like one of the 7 wonders of the world.

Swimmer Ricky Berens accidentally split his uniform at the Fina World Championship in Rome. Or he just trying to use the swimming pool as a giant toilet. Who knows?

It's good to know that even though she's been out of the limelight, Jessica Simpson still has her boobs. That just lets us know the world doing alright.

According to every penis in the world, this lady won the best butt of 2009.

1) Why the hell would anyone buy a magazine with Zac Efron on the cover? 2) Why would anybody buy GQ if this is the stuff they're gonna put on covers? And 3) You clicked on a picture of Zac Efron and that means you're gay.

If this girl gets any more hot she's gonna blow up -- the world! Hey ohhhhhh!

Brazilian model Sheyla Hershey supposedly has the biggest breasts in the world. They're triple KKK, which we didn't even know existed. You think these are hot?

Jenna used to be the hottest girl in the world. Then she got anorexic. And now she's pregnant, and possibly hot again. Maybe we just like pregnant chicks these days.

These guys were once world famous.

If that thing fell into the water there would be a tsunami that would destroy the world.

Oktober Fest marks one of the greatest months for breast lovers around the world.

This photo was taken before Scarlett's boobs were world famous for being awesome.

10 years ago, we only had 2 kinds of T-shirts to choose from; today we have 3!

These two have seen The Dark Knight, and you most likely have not. It's a cruel world we live in.

Ashley Harkleroad was defeated in the first round 6-4, 6-3 by some French chick. Hairy armpits should never defeat Grade A American ass, this is will not be tolerated.

Jelena Jankovic won Tuesday in straight sets, 6-3, 6-2. Jelena is the 2 seed in the tournament but she's #1 in our hearts with that skirt.

Too soon? Come on people, the Civil War was almost 150 years ago. He's merely suggesting that he'd sacrifice another million plus soldiers to keep the South's "freedoms" intact.

I'll be able to answer phones, get drunk, start wars, and do all the other things boy presidents do, don't worry about it.