Tom Cruise Tries To Fix It All With Bears
Not even a stuff bear will make Suri happy about having Tom Cruise as a father.
Katie Holmes Turns On The Lights
Katie Holmes is simply excited because Tom Cruise isn't by her side.
Tom Cruise is Two Steps Above The Rest
For all you ladies with Maverick fantasies, this is why he was cast, pilots are tiny.
Dude Ass Pats Giselle
Tom Brady is watching you young man, he's watching you like the Jets in Cover-2.
The Real Tom Cruise
Cyber skin removed, this is what Tom really looks like. No self respecting gay man should ever let himself get this fat. Queericide, it’s the only answer.
Suri Cruise - 20 Years Later
Tom Cruise and Katie "Robot" Holmes have used the power of Xenu to fast forward time to see what their beautiful baby girl will look like. My eyes… my eyes.
The Gays are Flaming Mad
A world-renowned gay bar caught fire this week. In typical fashion, the gays used it as en excuse to party and freak out the squares. Tom Cruise had no comment.
756 mg
Barry Bonds passed Hank Aaron last night. There is still no evidence that this should raise suspicion.
Tom Cruise is a Dancing Machine
Tom & Katie boogied their butts off at the Beckhams "Welcome to America" party – apparently the chicken dance makes Tom sweat!
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