Talk about chubbing up. Lay off the Doritos and pick up the crystal meth!

His friends said she kind of looked like a horse, but he didn't know what they were talking about.

We'd love to skateboard on this if only to a rim job of the rails on a half pipe. (wait...we're trying to talk Sk8r. Did that make any sense?)

Nikki Cox used to be our #1 squeeze. Now she's the picture of death. Rollover the picture to see what we're talking about.

With the bad economy and all this political talk, sometimes it's just nice to look at pictures like this. Two different people, just getting along.

They listened to Soundgarden, watched Singles, and talked about how much easier life would be if they lived in Seattle.

Kate Moss dresses like a pigeon and craps on the street.

Computer nerds around the world go from floppy (disk drive) to hard (disk drive) when they see this beauty roll down the street.

Wow, Amy Whinehouse was an UGLY kid, talk about Ugly Betty. Forget rehab, they should have sent you to Planned Parenthood, 8 years earlier.

Quato, the talking fetus from Total Recall has FINALLY found new work! Thank God, watch him this fall on Fox, your home for quality entertainment.

"OK so get this officer, I was chasing a burglar out of my house, right? Then my pants just shot off into the street and he pulled out a gun, I got scared and I..."

Sit down on my lap, sweetie, and we'll talk about whatever pops up. Too late!

Altar boys run crying where these two streets meet.

He was shot in the back of the head. What a shame. Now the Sesame Street neighborhood Girl Scouts will never make enough money for their camping trip.

Paulina Rubio is no stranger to showing off her nether regions, but word on the street is that she keeps her Baja Fresh.

Salma Hayek did an ad campaign for Campari spirits. She let her boobies do the talking.

Word on the street is that Hugh Hefner is planning a proposal to his number-one girl friend, Holly Madison. Go for it, Hef!

I think she should just slap an eyepatch on that and get herself some pirate street-cred.

Next week we'll be brought to you by the letter H!

Hey, Turtle, call my shell-phone, we'll talk!