The bird should have not to stolen his fries.

This 27-year-old Obama speech writer (left) is in a little trouble for grabbing fake Hillary Clinton's fake boob. We'd understand if he was grabbing Palin's breasteses, cause she's hot, but whatevs. If he likes man-boobs that's his deal.

Laura Harring, aka that hot chick from the movie Mulholland Drive, obviously needs a new stylist for her head.

Here's an image from the Jessica Alba Campari calendar that's coming out. They could sell this thing without the calendar for all we care. Everyday is Alba day to us!

This seals the deal. Today Britney Spears performed on Good Morning America and she looked smoking hot. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRITNEY!

With the Death Star complete and Santa out of the way, nothing can stop them from destroying Alderon!

Her name is Jennifer Ellison and I guess she's a big deal in England, probably because she has big boobs.

And you can shove it where the sun don't shine.

If you don't get this guy a present, he'll forever stare at you from across the room.

If that thing fell into the water there would be a tsunami that would destroy the world.

"Interesting" is the only way we could describe what you're looking at here. We don't want to offend the old lady.

Celebrate Halloween by burning down your house.

We totally wear her outfit when we're cleaning out the gutters, too.

She's wearing a scarf with donkeys on it. A Donkey is a sign of the Democratic Party. We really can't be witty about something like this.

Show the neighbors how annoying you are by putting one of these pumpkins on your doorstep for Halloween.

Sarah Palin's legs are so much hotter than Barack Obama's.

Way to get back on the radar, Elizabeth.

Don't walk in his path or he'll eat you.

...if cheater on the set of your TV show was actually cheating.

Here's a first look at porn star Lisa Ann. She's going to be playing Sarah Palin in the Hustler porno about the VP candidate. Schwing!