Jessica Simpson has lost about 30 pounds, and has obviously be working out – she's got the calves to prove it!

Get it? Because the Illinois Governor is a crook and the sofa shop is having a sale?

Get it? Cause you can only see half her ass in the photo, and it doesn't look like she's trying very hard.

Paris kept her promises and immediately opened a shelter for women when she was released from jail. Here you can see her passing out soup to the needy. What a heart of gold!

What a perfect way to end the year with a big pile of Katy Perry's boobies. Enjoy!

And the baby's first words are going to be "Wha Whaaaa!" Hey oh!

What's the point of a calendar filled with boobs? It's not like you're going to be looking at the dates anyway. You're going to be looking at the boobs. Just take the dates away and leave the boobs.

Wouldn't it suck if she was really holding a pair of balls?

The bird should have not to stolen his fries.

Laura Harring, aka that hot chick from the movie Mulholland Drive, obviously needs a new stylist for her head.

Here's an image from the Jessica Alba Campari calendar that's coming out. They could sell this thing without the calendar for all we care. Everyday is Alba day to us!

This seals the deal. Today Britney Spears performed on Good Morning America and she looked smoking hot. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRITNEY!

With the Death Star complete and Santa out of the way, nothing can stop them from destroying Alderon!

I dare you to say one bad thing about this girl.

And you can shove it where the sun don't shine.

If you don't get this guy a present, he'll forever stare at you from across the room.

If that thing fell into the water there would be a tsunami that would destroy the world.

And by "kind of" we mean OMFG TOTALLY.

Why must we always post pictures of Obama Girl? Because she's really easy to look at, that's why.

"Interesting" is the only way we could describe what you're looking at here. We don't want to offend the old lady.