Stare at this image of Paris Hilton weeping in the back seat of a squad car, and feel the tranquility sweep over your body, cleansing it with its calming coolness. Om......

Even a carton bully laughs at you, Paris.

Paris is getting hauled off *BACK* to Lynwood today! Are you ecstatic or sad?

This morning (June 8, 2007) Paris Hilton was cuffed and taken by squad car after a judge has ordered her back in court.... and back to JAIL!!

Perhaps representing the height of celebrity mugshots, Paris proves she's always herself by posing her ass off for the cops. Nice.

Paris Hilton's wax figure got outfitted in prison stripes... good thing stripes are in this season!!

Paris doesn't need a bra for support, when she's got God and the good book on her side!

She's like a 13-year-old girl who cuts out words and pictures from tampon ads in women's magazines to express her emotions. God she's stupid.

Paris is getting into shape before prison, and luckily for us man-lovers, her trainer is SUPER hot!!

While the paparazzi chased Paris as SHE was driving in her Bentley, they caught a glimpse into her window, texting Paris Latsis that she'd 'come by' after her lawyer meeting. She's gettin' some from a dude before she has to give it up to her bull-dyke cellmates!

Paris Hilton constantly inspires art. That's why someone made a wax rendition of her in the middle of a suicide attempt. That won't get you out of prison, Paris!!

Even the wind is against Ms. Hilton as she leaves a courthouse appearance. Remember, Paris, behind bars you only get two pairs of undies per week!

Paris Hilton got sentenced to 45 days in jail! YAY!!!!

Seriously, we get it, you've got some amazing new bra that you're trying to create a buzz around. Super. Now make yourself useful and become Volvo airbags.

Not the first time, probably not the last.

Oh, please, like you haven't seen these a thousand times before!

Paris has huge boobs now! When exactly did this happen? How does she pull this off? Why can't I stop looking at them??

The jury is out for some, but for those of us who've been following the recent growth of the celebutard's lady-pillows, I think she's gotten something done.

Slutty, slutty, forgotten Hilton.

Ever-freaky Courtney Love looks like a bloated, exploding French maid. Even Paris looks normal next to her.