At a mere 49 Melanie Griffith is sagging in all the wrong places (because there are *right* places to sag) and her knees aren't making her look any younger.

Visual gags never get old.

Anand Jon Alexander is currently facing multiple felony counts of rape and sexual assault between October of 2004 and March 5, 2007, involving three alleged victims, the youngest a 15-year-old girl.

I'd be angry too if I looked that old and haggish. Gross.

Paris was pulled over on Sunset Blvd Tuesday evening for driving without her headlights. She was also driving on a suspended license – and her car got impounded! Anyone think she looks like an old hag??

This hot, pants-less 18-year-old model recently died of a heart attack. Seriously, all the sexy skinny chicks are croaking!

From "Paris Exposed" – her old boyfriend exposed her ass!

Liver spots? Check. Bags under the eyes? Check. Sagging mouth? Check. Creepy old lady neck? Check. Looks like Goldie Hawn should be CHECKing in at her plastic surgeon!

Paris & Nikki Hilton and Nicole Richie are seen here posing with Michael Jackson. Weirder still is the old man next to them with the oxygen machine.

This is some sort of product for the Nintendo DS. And if an old greasy man tries to give it to you from his creepy van, RUN! RUN AWAY!!!!

This is Disco Duck's older brother.

When art is combined with the dirty mind of a 5-year-old, amazing things are created.

I thought she got reconstructive surgery on her spam-stomach? Apparently it still looks like a 55-year-old-sunbather's abdomen.

In this photo released by the Glendale Police Department, Nicole Richie's booking mug shot is seen after her arrest early Monday, Dec. 11, 2006, for investigation of driving under the influence of alcohol, in Glendale, Calif. California Highway Patrol officers took the 25-year-old daughter of pop singer Lionel Richie into custody without incident after she failed a field sobriety test, CHP Officer Todd Workman said.

Judging by the lace on the pocket, I'd say these jeans split 'cause they're 25 frickin' years old.

Where is the score card for the old lady in a wheel chair?

Wouldn't it be funny if this was an old picture of Nicole Ritchie? No? Shut up.

Do you know what an older man can give you?

If Superheroes get old, I bet a lot of people would want to change their diapers.

Yes, but how old do you have to be?