Lay off the cheesburgers, Jason Biggs. Just because you're not working lately doesn't give you a license to eat every studio head that doesn't put you in a movie.

Lindsay Lohan almost looks like a little boy. EAT A SANDWICH, GIRL!

We would do anything to have Supergirl's powers for a day. Is that so much to ask?

This is Ryan Seacrest as a kid, and as you can see, he still looks really gay.

Because she's awesome, Heather Graham didn't wear a bra to the UK Hangover premiere. For this we believe she is the greatest actress of our generation.

Here's Phil Spector's mugshot. You have permission to vomit now.

It's good to know that even though she's been out of the limelight, Jessica Simpson still has her boobs. That just lets us know the world doing alright.

We don't understand Drew's style. I mean, she's Hollywood Royalty. And on most days she's really hot. WTF.

This is sexist because it's true.

She's Brazilian, she's tabloid famous and what you really want to know, her butt measures 46 inches all the way around. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it if that's at all possible given the size constraints.

Remember Natalie Imbruglia? She sings that one song we forgot the name off? Well yeah, here she is. She had to wear a bikini to make people notice here again.

No, you're not seeing things. Those are a bunch of Princess Leias being hot and awesome and hitting each other with pillows.

We don't pay attention to Kourtney Kardashian that much. But that's all changed with these pictures.

This is Demi Moore and now you don't have a boner for her.

You don't have to see this girl's face; it's busted. Instead, look at the ocean...the beach...that dude with the towel on his head. If you like, you can also look at Shauna's boobs.

Oh look! Our favorite non-celebrity announced she's pregnant on Twitter. Here's what her stomach is going to look like in a couple months, as imagined by our friends at Starcasm.com.

Kara, why did you hide what's underneath your clothes throughout the whole season? We find you a lot less annoying and totally pointless now.

Kris Allen looks so happy to be the next Ruben Studdard.

We had no idea we had to bend ourselves that way to pee. Ouch.

Just face it: you will never get a girl as hot as Hayden, just continue to be a big fat dork.