Britney acknowledges her pantyless ways -- and plugs VS, to boot!

Friends of Britney Spears have confirmed the ongoing rumor that the actress cuts herself. Apparently she was seen grinding a butter knife against her wrist as she spoke of the stresses and pressure of her life.

This is the kinda technology that the paparazzi need. Turn into a camera, take some photos of Britney's crotch, then transform into a car and drive away when Linsday Lohan tries to hit you with her car.

I don't get it. Is it free to enter, and $5 to leave? WTF?

Paris, Lindsay and Britney are the "Three Disgraces" - like Greek mythology for the celebutard set.

For her birthday party and Mr. Chows, Britney decided to dress up in a pair of underpants! Huzzah!

Jesus freakin' Cripes, woman, now even your boobs look messed up? Get it together already, Brit!!

Girl, fix yo' hair! Yo' weave be showin', skank!

"Here, honeyyyyyy, you nip's slipping out a littlllllle. Lemme just cover it ith my haaaaaand. We're hot even when we're waaasteeed."

Alright, enough already -- we've seen your boobs!!

Friends poop alike.

Don't be distracted by the funny sign -- there's bears mating on the left!

Leave it to the potheads to come up with clever political advertising.

Video gamers sure love to OWN people.