She must suck blood or something because those eyes definitely say "I'M NOT HUMAN. THERE IS SOMETHING WEIRD ABOUT ME."

We'd love to skateboard on this if only to a rim job of the rails on a half pipe. (wait...we're trying to talk Sk8r. Did that make any sense?)

...the blood out of you!!! Watch out for her teeth...and her boyfriend from Sum 41. That dude will slap you if you mess with Avril!

Get it? Cause you can only see half her ass in the photo, and it doesn't look like she's trying very hard.

She's definitely less annoying when you can see half her boobs.

Elena Dementieva was defeated today at Wimbledon in straight sets by one half of the Muscular Sisters. Thus eliminating all of the hot and our interest in tennis.

The fact that you can even acquire a dress with Bambi's spewing blood all over the place is only slightly less disturbing than actually wearing it, rock on Lily!

Puts a whole new spin on the term "Blood Diamonds"… menstruations jokes too tacky?

This Benz is diamond studded and cost over $5 million dollars. It belongs to Prince Waleed, an oil sheik. Bastards! The terrorists did win!

Trying to smuggle nuts to Al-Qaeda? Don’t even think about it, or end up like this guy here! And now you know and knowing is half the battle!

Zsa Zsa late husband claims he was robbed and forced to undress by three woman, at gunpoint. Oddly enough they didn’t steal his car or his cell phone... Someone's pants are on fire.

Cheeky Charles makes the moves on a lady soldier. Oh, behave!

Sharon Stone looks like a raven-haired zombie, sucking the blood of small children out of a cleverly disguised coffee cup.

Kanye West and P. Diddy were guests at England's "concert for Diana," where they posed with her son, Prince Harry. Kanye wore douche-bag 80s Pringles sunglasses and Diddy sported the classiest Diana t-shirt he could find in the hamper. Great job, guys.

How much more adorable can a freakin' scary photo of a blood-thirsty dog be?

An 11-year-old shot and killed a massive, half-ton wild hog that was even bigger than the famed 'Hogzilla.' The kid's hunting career started at age five. Nice.

Don't be distracted by his large, phallic guitar. There's a REAL "lil' Prince" he wants you to check out.

That's one royal handful you've got there, Willy!

The Olsen Twins are now one chick, since both of them are basically half a person.