Why are they pointing down?

It's the 2001 Britney Spears all over again in 2K9. We feel blessed.

Somebody turn off the air conditioning! We've got a live one here!

Here's a leaked screen shot from one of Britney Spears' music videos. It's censored because her nipples aren't really that big a deal.

Somebody is a bit too eager to get a piece of Britney Spears' new body.

This seals the deal. Today Britney Spears performed on Good Morning America and she looked smoking hot. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BRITNEY!

Ewwwwww.

Here are some photos of Britney from here latest video shoot. We likey.

After Britney realized she was wearing a bra, she immediately corrected the situation by taking it off and wrapping it around her head, Weird Science-style. Crazy again!

OMG, Britney Spears has a scar on her knee! We had no idea!

Almost forgot about you, how are you doing? Wearing sweatpants, smoking cigarettes, and showing a little bump, good to see you're staying the course.

Britney's secret to weight loss is apparently time travel which raises the very real possibility of an alternate 2003 being created where she never meets K-Fed.

She's a lot like her sister, she has amazing boobs at a young age and seems destined for a miserable failure of a life.

If you were to look into a Britney Spears crystal ball it most likely would show this. Everyone knows Oompa Loompas are more supportive than Lynne Spears.

This little toy will have to substitute for Mommy Spears for a while, at least it will remind the kids why it is a good thing she's gone.

Britney Spears ran across the western hemisphere, crushing several small villages and leaving massive footprints in her wake.

Britney Spears forgot, once again, to wear clothes big enough to cover her saggy saddlebags. Someone buy this girl a tent or a few yards of cloth.

Britney Spears finally got her Drivers License. Ever the money hungry entrepreneur, she had Cheetos sponsor her "fun run" through the driving test. As seen on http://prettyontheoutside.com

Britney Spears attempts to sell greedy consumers more useless crap, this time taking the form of her own perfume. We don't plan on speaking for everyone, but what woman wants to smell like Kevin Federline's crotch and Papst Blue Ribbon?

Wow you guys, only in our wildest dreams could we afford such a nice dress and beautiful hair extensions. Having such a dress allows for quick toilet use, sans the hassle of cleanup.