...Just to use as a comparison to Perez's version, and to those Yogis. Gross"

Blogger Perez Hilton succeeded in making Britney Spears look sexy and fit by comparison when he paraded hit fat ass around in a pink wig, flip flops, and a Cheetos bag. He even out-crotched her.

He must be hitting the buffets with Schwarzenegger these days.

Kim Kardashian has an amazing fat ass. I just had to post this photo.

Persian bubble-butt babe and sex tape maker extraordinaire Kim Kardashian takes her ass for a walk in some plushy pants. It's like two fat kittens wrestling down there!

The question all women ask: do these pasties make me look fat?

...And he's still an ugly man. Booyah!

She's still too fat – those ribs should be sharper. Chunko.

Johnny hit the jackpot this summer when he realized he could fill freezer bags with grass-clippings and make a fortune selling weed to Jr. High kids.

You Damn Kids!

An 11-year-old shot and killed a massive, half-ton wild hog that was even bigger than the famed 'Hogzilla.' The kid's hunting career started at age five. Nice.

Jessica Simpson's gained weight recently, and it's really started to show. All the spray-on tanner in the world can't hide these rolls!!

For some god-awful reason, K-Mart sells bacon. Maybe because they have to do SOMETHING with all the extra back-fat from the morbidly obese pigs they employ.

They say they're hanging out for their kids' benefit. I say they're screwing.

They say having friends that are fatter than you makes you look skinnier. What exactly is Kate Moss's reason?

If you're going to fall off a 9-story building, at least land like you're in a cartoon.

The answer: yes.

Getting off smack sometimes makes you gain weight. Just sayin'.

Amy Winehouse may have alcoholism in her name, but she also has blow in her nose! When whiskey makes you fat, how does one keep in brillant shape? Snort away the pounds!

Right after this photo was taken, they gang-raped a goth kid with a football. Seriously, these guys are jerks.