Looks like the night is over for her.

She just needs some help releasing it.

The Sacremento Kings dancers are being "disciplined" for getting drunk and taking sexy pics. And the NBA wonders why no one watches.

OH HAI, CAMERA PERSON. CAN U PLS TAKE PIC NOW!?!

This kid is going to grow up to be such a baller.

We don't care if this is just an obvious ad for Pepsi. This is a photo of Kim Kardashian and we're required to post every picture of her.

Obama might be gay...at least according to the Globe, who we believe almost 100% of the time when we're really drunk.

What a comeback. Now all she needs to do is find her brain and she'll finally be complete.

And the baby's first words are going to be "Wha Whaaaa!" Hey oh!

Ashlee Simpson's pregnancy has created what will be an epic "Boob-off" between Ashlee and Jessica, Master of Incest, Joe Simpson, of course will be the referee.

New from IKEA, The Kim Kardashian Booty Table, place one in the backyard and conveniently rest your drink on the ample derriere.

If she thinks getting off The Pill and getting into baby-making position with a dude from Good Charlotte shows her new found maturity she's got another thing coming (a dumb baby).

If drinking Dunkin' Donuts and wearing last year's Urban Outfitters fashions make you a terrorist America is in more trouble than we thought.

I'll be able to answer phones, get drunk, start wars, and do all the other things boy presidents do, don't worry about it.

Many have speculated as to how Hayden Panettiere has not become addicted to sex, drugs and booze, the answer is she has a different addiction, eating the heads off babies.

They can take the booze out of the drunk but they can't take the fun out of the fun bags.

Sometimes when you're applying the spray on you're drunk and decide the tan line beard look is in.

The hair is not distracting from your baby bump, it just makes your whole appearance more disturbing.

This bar in New Lisbon, Wisc., believes that winners drink and losers pee.

Tara Reid will probably have kids soon to harvest their livers.