Demi Moore is in her 40's and she still looks 25! She obviously drinks unborn children out of the Cup Of Christ. She has chosen Wisely!

In Russia, they love Vodka so much, that during times of peace, all guards carry AK-47'S made of Vodka Bottles. Drink up you commie bastards!

In Germany the future has arrived. You can play video games while you pee.

Britney got drunk and topless after shooting a "video". Her assistant arranged for her to make out with an extra. He sold the pictures to pay for the doctor's visit the next day.

Froot Loops now have straws made of cereal to suck up your leftover milk! No more looking like a slob, drinking from the bowl.

Nicole Richie sent a sarcastic yet caustic email invitation to her Memorial Day BBQ that demanded binge-drinking and anorexia at the bash. Later Mischa Barton passed out.

Now that she's BACK in rehab with a DUI under her belt, Svedka Vodka has pulled the plug on hosting her party (as in, busloads of free vodka) and the tragic irony of a 20-year-old in a drunk driving accident just weeks before her 21st birthday starts to sink in. Fun!

We love Paula Abdul because she never fails to make us laugh. ...at how drunk she is.

A recent stint at a celebrity volleyball game revealed the Desperate Housewife's chalupa. And there's a mole on it.

I say she's drunk.

Bob Clark, the director of "Christmas Story," was killed yesterday morning by a drunk driver. Hollywood mourns.

"The Fox" showed up at her DUI hearing looking as good as she ever has! (And not really that drunk)

The couple that parties together, eventually will have to enter rehab together. Welcome to L.A., Beckhams!!

These two make a fug-fabulous couple! Who's got the flask?

Fergie was TOO DRUNK TO FLY the other day when she tried to board a flight to L.A. from London. They wouldn't let her on, and she was falling over. (We presume she was sober enough when she did this Maxim shoot)

DO NOT ACCUSE LOHAN OF DRUNK DRIVING. She will zap you.

Seriously, what followed next makes Madonna's "SEX" book look like a children's story. Hot.

I love the XXX-Games. I'm a pro-BMXXXer. Hee hee.

Don't blow on this game cartridge if it's not working! It'll melt!

Everybody gots to gets drunk. Even Sleepy The Bird.