With a real strict door policy.

Apparently, comparing Michael Bay to Hitler didn't exactly please Steven Spielberg and that's why she isn't in the new movie. As always, I am 100% Team Spielberg.

This is a woman who is clearly familiar with double-stick tape. But maybe she needed to air them out?

Even a tramp needs the support of their family.

It's official, Jordin Sparks has a smokin' bikini body.

Or at least a well staged photograph.

Just in time for Father's Day.

It's really cool if you maintain a sense of humor.

Is in dire need of a sandwich.

It's pretty obvious who doesn't belong in this picture.

Yeah, we'd definitely think about asking for her hand in marriage or just have sex with her. Whatevs.

Part of us is jealous and we wish this would happen to our foot. It would be a great way to spend the afternoon.

Her butt makes us want to cry happy tears just to know something like it exists in this horrible world.

100% more Annoying or a 100% Fierce? We'd like to punch her in the face either way - in a total non-wife-beat-y sort of way!

Here's Marisa wearing a 3 million dollar bra from Harlequin Fantasy Bra. Tell us: how did her boobs get so rich that they're able to afford such a luxury? I mean, all they do is just sit there and look awesome. Not fair!

Oh, look who got a new pair of boobs! And from the looks of it they fell right out of a gumball machine and onto her chest. Now we know Amy is rich, so why does it look like she has a cheap a boob job as that girl in high school who got addicted to crack, like, ten years later?

Friends. They are awesome. Except when they are a-holes.

Just kidding. We don't know if Lohan does meth, she probably doesn't. But we certainly know she has a meth face, which is the WORST kind of face if you're going to have any face at all.

It doesn't even make sense to hate Clooney these days because you will never topple his ability to score the greatest looking females on the planet. Just accept it and move on. We've been studying Buddhism, dudes. You can stare at Elisabetta Canalis forever if you want to. But for us, it's time to chillax. Later.

We look and look and look at this photo but we have NO idea whether or not she has gut. Are we blind? Or do we just expect our bikini guts these days to be as flat as flat can be? We're picking up a Victoria Secret catalog to find out.