The whale that is Aretha Franklin and the pshyco that is Cyndi Lauper were photographed together at the Grammys. What will Britney look like at their age?

Since it has literally become unthinkable that people will ever feel sympathy and "Leave Britney Alone", think of the poor dog that has to live through this.

Y'all was yelling at her for always having her mammary glands poking through shirts so she put on a bra. What more do you want?

Or at least that is what the Associated Press is hoping, guys already wrote up her obituary.

If you were to look into a Britney Spears crystal ball it most likely would show this. Everyone knows Oompa Loompas are more supportive than Lynne Spears.

This little toy will have to substitute for Mommy Spears for a while, at least it will remind the kids why it is a good thing she's gone.

Britney may have had an "episode" last night but Hillary Clinton isn't feeling too good either after millions of dollars and being nice to Bill only gave her 3rd place.

Fat Tranny or Britney? Either way, you lose.

Forget the writers strike! Team Britney is making rounds and reminding you, even fat people and unibrows have opinions.

Britney attempts to renew her drivers license and is forced to bring Dakota along. Ugly people work at the DMV.

Why does she look like she just reached the end of a 3 week bender?

Britney Spears ran across the western hemisphere, crushing several small villages and leaving massive footprints in her wake.

Britney tries to escape the set of Donald's new reality TV show with the help of a clever disguise and a wish… and a dream. Will she make it? Will you care?

Britney Spears forgot, once again, to wear clothes big enough to cover her saggy saddlebags. Someone buy this girl a tent or a few yards of cloth.

Britney Spears finally got her Drivers License. Ever the money hungry entrepreneur, she had Cheetos sponsor her "fun run" through the driving test. As seen on http://prettyontheoutside.com

Britney Spears attempts to sell greedy consumers more useless crap, this time taking the form of her own perfume. We don't plan on speaking for everyone, but what woman wants to smell like Kevin Federline's crotch and Papst Blue Ribbon?

Wow you guys, only in our wildest dreams could we afford such a nice dress and beautiful hair extensions. Having such a dress allows for quick toilet use, sans the hassle of cleanup.

A genetically engineered Britney-Rosie Hybrid terrorized the Airwaves spewing hours of militant lesbian, anti-clothes wearing antics.

… is not like the others. Poor little pasty Jan Brady got lost amongst a sea of breasticles. She needed some of that fake Britney ab tan.

The horrendous atrocity that was the Britney Spears VMA performance can be summed up in this one image. Priceless.