If you're going to fall off a 9-story building, at least land like you're in a cartoon.

Britney left rehab this morning! One of her dancers apparently picked her up, less than 24 hours after she checked in.

After corrective plastic surgery, Tara's abs are looking less like Sloppy Joe's and more like a stomach.

A surprisingly sober Tara Reid is looking less like a bag o' puke these days. Good for her.

This hot, pants-less 18-year-old model recently died of a heart attack. Seriously, all the sexy skinny chicks are croaking!

Innocent little Nicole on her U of AZ "Cat Card." Charming!

Jessica's side boobs are always worth a little uproar.

These little guys REALLY need the Kiss boots.

Getting to second base with this lion is a little trickier, however.

This first thing I thought when I first saw the pink iPod was, "wow, if this could only be used by girls to masturbate." Little did I know.

Sporting events are the perfect opportunity to grab a little piece o' boobage.

For the little kid in all of us.

At least the chair survived.

When you crack open this piñata, little US Army men fall out! Let's inspect it for WMDs!

Vroom, vroom, little turtle. Vroom, vroom.

Remember the pictures of those delicately carved pencils that were going around some odd years ago? Well some meticulous little snot did it in Technicolor!!

Donald! You little so-and-so! It's not time for Xtina's nips to come out yet!

At least her skirt's not tucked into her underwear!

At least you'd never drop it in prison!

A little spray paint can make your doggy purrrfectly adorable!