Apparently, comparing Michael Bay to Hitler didn't exactly please Steven Spielberg and that's why she isn't in the new movie. As always, I am 100% Team Spielberg.

As pissed as she looks, I hope she still autographed the picture.

You know your night is gonna be crazy, when you hook up with this chick.

I don't think one of those cameras is pointed at the car.

Her butt makes us want to cry happy tears just to know something like it exists in this horrible world.

Here's Marisa wearing a 3 million dollar bra from Harlequin Fantasy Bra. Tell us: how did her boobs get so rich that they're able to afford such a luxury? I mean, all they do is just sit there and look awesome. Not fair!

Oh, look who got a new pair of boobs! And from the looks of it they fell right out of a gumball machine and onto her chest. Now we know Amy is rich, so why does it look like she has a cheap a boob job as that girl in high school who got addicted to crack, like, ten years later?

We never knew the Jonas Bros. were such sluts.

Just kidding. We don't know if Lohan does meth, she probably doesn't. But we certainly know she has a meth face, which is the WORST kind of face if you're going to have any face at all.

This is like the day I found out Santa wasn't real.

If you're going to show up at the Emmy's pregnant, I guess you might as well show up REALLY pregnant and just freak everybody out.

Yes, she's one of our favorites. And yes, we don't know who that dude is standing next to her but we want to punch him in the face and steal Sophia away.

Google knows what Kanye West really is...

I love how the two a-holes below them are posing for a picture. Those are lifetime friends.

Usually, Audrina Partridge looks dumb in the face. But not here. She just looks totally hot, and I as I type this message here with one hand, I can't help but notice that I am going to explode soon.

Justin Timberlake has a nice rack. I bet his ass is pretty awesome, too.

She must suck blood or something because those eyes definitely say "I'M NOT HUMAN. THERE IS SOMETHING WEIRD ABOUT ME."

Sometimes the internet just knows the right things to say.

Here's Lindsay Lohan on the set of her new movie Machete. How she's working again we have no idea. All we know is that she sucks at using spray tan.

I won't let myself fall asleep these days because I'm worried I'll have nightmares about this"