It's official, Jordin Sparks has a smokin' bikini body.

Yeah, we'd definitely think about asking for her hand in marriage or just have sex with her. Whatevs.

It's really not too difficult for her to completely distract us.

Oh, look who got a new pair of boobs! And from the looks of it they fell right out of a gumball machine and onto her chest. Now we know Amy is rich, so why does it look like she has a cheap a boob job as that girl in high school who got addicted to crack, like, ten years later?

Just kidding. We don't know if Lohan does meth, she probably doesn't. But we certainly know she has a meth face, which is the WORST kind of face if you're going to have any face at all.

We're not going to lie: this totally made us want to run to the bathroom, turn off the lights and hope to God nobody hears us.

We look and look and look at this photo but we have NO idea whether or not she has gut. Are we blind? Or do we just expect our bikini guts these days to be as flat as flat can be? We're picking up a Victoria Secret catalog to find out.

Here are photos from January Jones' appearance in the latest GQ, a magazine we would have no interesting in buying if it wasn't for photos like these.

People sure have interesting questions for Lady Gaga.

You really have to think before you post. Never forget that, fools.

Christina: You have boobs. Show them.

Halle Berry denied she was pregnant again on the Jay Leno Show last night, putting to rest the rumors that her boobs were just big because she's having a kid. No, they're just naturally awesome like that.

If R2D2 really looked like we're pretty sure he could have killed Darth Vader is his ass-rays. Hey Oh!

Justin Timberlake has a nice rack. I bet his ass is pretty awesome, too.

Since this is Courtney Love, we're not even going to bother to ask questions about what's going on here.

Here's Lindsay Lohan on the set of her new movie Machete. How she's working again we have no idea. All we know is that she sucks at using spray tan.

We have no idea why she's famous other than the fact that when you look at her it's like you're seeing an angel. An angel with a hot ass and really nice boobs.

I won't let myself fall asleep these days because I'm worried I'll have nightmares about this"

She has to be around 55-years-old, but Jennifer Connelly is still very much a part of our imagination as we daydream about doing it with movie stars.

I always knew she had one.