Or at least a well staged photograph.

The Sacremento Kings dancers are being "disciplined" for getting drunk and taking sexy pics. And the NBA wonders why no one watches.

Just put a meat bone in her hand and Sarah Jessica Parker looks just as sexy as Dee Snider in Twisted Sister. Here she is on the set of the new Sex & The City 2, during a flashback of sorts to the 80s, when she was uglier.

If you're even close to hot you should do what you can to get this costume and bring it to the Harry Potter premiere this week.

We're suddenly turned on by the lazy, furry cat.

If you're wondering who Leighton Meester is, this is her. TMZ is reporting she has a sex tape that's being shopped around Hollywood. And it involves her feet. Sexy!

Avert your eyes!?! Get sexy with yourself!?! We can't tell what's going on here either.

Rupert Everett allegedly got a face lift. Or two or five of them.

Oksana Pochepa is the Russian pop star who's allegedly banging Mel Gibson. We salute you, Mel Gibson. Girls who don't speak English are sexy.

Yeah, we think Barbie is a lot sexier than Mickey Mouse, too.

That's some sexy makeup!

Who would have known that underneath Chloe's disturbing lemon scowl there's actually a hot babe bursting at the seams. Despite Jay Leno ruining the picture, she's almost a 10.

Not the most sexy picture of Kim Kardashian, especially with all that farting going on.

If you look at Sophie Monk for more than 10 seconds it's like drugs.

Nothing turns us on more than man hands and alien face.

10 years ago, we only had 2 kinds of T-shirts to choose from; today we have 3!

Dear Dean McDermott, while most think you're insane for doing this, knowing that your first child has a 10 million dollar trust fund, this was probably a good investment.

The most shocking thing is not how sexy she looks at age 16, it's how shockingly 90s the photo backdrop is.

Sexual thoughts aside… what's with the blue outfit? There isn't much sexy about screwing a zip lock bag.

How fat do you have to be in order for a DSL line to have trouble downloading your picture? This fat.