NEWS
Anna Nicole makes cash, Spinach makes you sick, and the Paparazzi makes Diaz’s day. Philip Norris has the stories, and he’s hopped up on “Cocaine.”
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9/21/2006
NEWS
Is Suri Cruise an imaginary baby? Which game system is for racists? Which celebrity roof caught on fire? Philip Norris has the answers!
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7/7/2006
NEWS
This week Britney Spears might be pregnant, President Bush is unpopular with the polls, Scott Stap is a douche bag, and more signs of the Apocalypse.
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3/10/2006
NEWS
This week Dick Cheney shoots a man, TomKat almost breaks up, and Kid Rock and Scott Stapp touch magic sticks. Disgusting, weird and newsworthy.
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2/17/2006
NEWS
This week Bush will address the nation, Google loves the communists, Joaquin Phoenix almost dies, Chris Penn does die, and Clay Aiken is gay.
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1/27/2006
NEWS
This week the internet made fun of Chuck Norris, the Golden Globes bored people, Jolie and Pitt hyphenate they’re kids’ names, and Goatse frightens your friend.
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1/20/2006
NEWS
This week Jessica and Nick call it quits, President Bush gives a hilarious speech and Vince Vaughn is a drunk!
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12/2/2005
NEWS
This week Dubya’s poll numbers are in the toilet, Lindsay Lohan wants to get married, Paris’ boytoy crashes a Bentley, and more celeb debauchery.
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11/11/2005
NEWS
This week Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston hook up, Bush and Bono have lunch together, Michael Jackson gets called for jury duty and other signs the world is a truly crunked-up place.
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10/21/2005
NEWS
Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.
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9/23/2005