Richie Sambora Is Drunk
This week your pal Philip Norris rants about how big of an idiot Richie Sambora is for driving drunk with his 10-year-old daughter in the car.
Child Star Almost Dies
Haley wrecked his car, Snakes switched to trains, and there’s no privacy at the sperm bank. Philip Norris is your man, although he’s too much of a pussy to go to the Middle East right now.
Dick Cheney's Duck Hunt
This week Dick Cheney shoots a man, TomKat almost breaks up, and Kid Rock and Scott Stapp touch magic sticks. Disgusting, weird and newsworthy.
New Year's Eve Sucks
This year New Year’s Eve sucks, the donut man dies, New Orleans comes back to life, and your mom looks at porn.
Suck My News Weekly: Old Dirty Bastards
Suck My News Weekly is a slanderous look at the week's news, hosted by the cranky and awesome Philip Norris.
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