Never heard of this boy band before, but there's so much awkward sexuality going on here I don't know where to start. Maybe "interracial gay pedophilia" is a good place.

There are a few rules to keep in mind when going drunken mini-golfing. Only I don't remember 'em 'cause I'm WASTED! Yeeah!!

Somehow these girls agreed to sit on the merry-go-round while these guys spun it with a scooter. And no, it doesn't end pretty.

Some business jerk goes absolutely berserk (like our rhyming style??) 'cause some Ian dude didn't show up for a meeting. Possibly very well-staged video, but he's still a hilarious d!©khead.

Sean Preston Federline was driving a Cadillac during a family go-kart outing. Damn, dat boy's PIMP!

Lindsay enjoy the sun at Venice beach when she went on a three-wheeling escape from rehab.

A dude trolls a Ventrilo clan channel with a Duke Nukem soundboard, and some woman goes absolutely ballistic about it. Hilarious AND geeky!

This Middle Eastern burial is very traditional – until the worst possible thing happens.

Conan sends Triumph the Insult Comic Dog to the Tonys, where he avoids all jokes about gays and how lame plays are. Just kidding, he's friggin hilarious.

"Stars Are Blind" remade by a sexy fake-Paris into an "autobiographical" story about going to jail. She gets cozy with the sheriff! Oh yeah!

There's a sinkhole in Mexico, and it's in Britney's ass. Too bad it couldn't suck up any of her cellulite (or crappy weave, for that matter).

The MTV Movie Awards always prompts some sort of gimmicky hi-jinx. Here's Jessica and Sarah pretending to go all "college-experimental" in front of America.

Eva Cavalli, sister of designer Roberto Cavalli, was working the runway when she had a fashion disaster! Good thing you were wearing knickers, Eva!

Douche Gone Wild.

This cute little kitty has a turtle buddy that likes to play. You'd think it'd be no match, but, damn! Watch that turtle go! Adorable AND violent!!

GQ goes behind the scenes at the Victoria's Secret fashion show to prove that it's not secretly a gay mag.

I went to the beach over the weekend and saw this woman whose sunglasses I loved!

Paris Hilton got sentenced to 45 days in jail! YAY!!!!

Vic Becks recently showed off her bullet nips, but there was something else going on with her outfit... then it hit me – Vagina Power lady!!

Fall Out Boy Pete Wentz wears eyeliner, but since he's a boy, we call it guyliner. Apparently this was worth an entire People Magazine news piece. I'm going to go kill myself now.