Now shut up.

You people are crazy.

If you interrupt Barack during a session of congress he will slice off your hand.

A little bit too much Viagra, Mr. Dole?

He was one of our favorite broadcasters. Sadface.

Ass. It's curves he can believe in.

If you wear this at the dinner table your parents will smack the crap out of you. FYI!

Obama might be gay...at least according to the Globe, who we believe almost 100% of the time when we're really drunk.

We're guessing CNN took this down almost as soon as they posted it.

This is officially the last Tay Zonday joke ever. We swear!

Wipe you're tears away, my friends. He's finally gone.

This is not Obama. He's an Indonesian journalist. He cannot provide change. He refuses to Yes your Can.

This is going to be such a bittersweet week. Take it in, guys. Take it in.

This 27-year-old Obama speech writer (left) is in a little trouble for grabbing fake Hillary Clinton's fake boob. We'd understand if he was grabbing Palin's breasteses, cause she's hot, but whatevs. If he likes man-boobs that's his deal.

She's wearing a scarf with donkeys on it. A Donkey is a sign of the Democratic Party. We really can't be witty about something like this.

Show the neighbors how annoying you are by putting one of these pumpkins on your doorstep for Halloween.

Sarah Palin's legs are so much hotter than Barack Obama's.

Don't walk in his path or he'll eat you.

Here's a first look at porn star Lisa Ann. She's going to be playing Sarah Palin in the Hustler porno about the VP candidate. Schwing!

This makes our decision so much easier.