Because there isn't really one running for president.
Since it has literally become unthinkable that people will ever feel sympathy and "Leave Britney Alone", think of the poor dog that has to live through this.
A coal worker in China takes a bath after a long day in the mines. Sorry Ling Po, no amount of water will shake off the black lung.
OH just, fishing off the back porch in Myrtle Beach when...... Luckily, these people kept their cool.
There's something about despicable acts of aggressive consumerism, that just puts me in the holiday mood.
Black tribesmen in Africa use their evil foot magic to revive a ranting Rosie O'Donnell. Food everywhere cowers in fear.
Some business jerk goes absolutely berserk (like our rhyming style??) 'cause some Ian dude didn't show up for a meeting. Possibly very well-staged video, but he's still a hilarious d!©khead.
Building a bridge over a river bed, because you think you're the man? Well Nature came up and just crap slapped you. Sit your ass down!
Beth Ditto showed the the world her lady bits and ended up looking more like a black hole, sucking the life out of the room.