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LOST SUMMER REVIEW COURSE: Sawyer's Nerdiest Nick Names
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If you’re feeling out of sorts at the water cooler this morning one
of two things has happened. Either the Others have spiked your
Aquafina supply or you’re going through Lost withdrawal. With no new episodes on deck till 2008 Lost
fans won’t have much to talk about on Thursday mornings for the next
six months. With that in mind LG is putting a LOST REVIEW COURSE on
its summer syllabus.
Today’s Lesson: Why Sawyer is a Geek.
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James “Sawyer” Ford is generally regarded as the stone cold bad ass
of Lost Island. But his squinty eyed, intense talking ways are all a
put on designed to belie his true nature. Sawyer is just as nerdy as
the fans that obsess over his show. The extensive list of nick names
that he bestows upon his fellow survivors is a testament to the dude’s
extensive background in pop-culture geekdom. He’s a fan of everything
from Ghostbusters to He-Man to Harvey Comics to
Professional Wrestling. Here are just a few of the dorkier nick names
Sawyer picked out for his cast away buddies.
Aaron: Baby Huey (overgrown cartoon duck)
Alex: Sheena (female Tarzan-type comic book character from late 1930’s)
Anna Lucia: Hot Lips (M.A.S.H. character)
Ben: George (Lead character from Of Mice and Men)
Bernard: Norma Rae (Union organizer portrayed by Sally field.)
Boone: Metro (Metro-sexual)
Charlie: Oliver Twist (Charles Dickens’ cockney orphan)
Mr. Eko: Mr. Ed (Talking sit-com horse)
Hurley: Grimace (Fat, purple McDonalds spokesman)
Jack: Dr. Giggles (1992 slasher film about a crazy doctor)
Jin: Chewie (Chewbacca the Wookie)
Karl: Bobby (Youngest male Brady sibling)
Kate: Magellan (Spanish Explorer)
Locke: Brutus (Stabbed Cesar)
Michael: Han (Han Solo)
Munson: Costanza (Bald, overweight Seinfeld side-kick)
Nikki and Paulo: Jabronies (Slang term popularized by the Rock to describe a wrestler of little worth).
Roger: Skeletor (Ruler of Grayskull)
Sayid: Captain A-Rab (Pun on Captain Ahab from Moby Dick)
Sun: Madame Butterfly (Italian Opera)
Walt: Short Round (Indiana Jones Asian child side-kick from Temple of Doom)
Forget
conning, if Sawyer wants to make some real cash once he gets off the
island he should go on an episode of “Win Ben Stein’s Money”. He’d
kill, especially is one of the question topics was Star Wars. So it
just goes to show you, geeks don’t have to be regulated to the Hurley
rolls. They can be front and center where all the action is… so long
as they can strangle a dude with a chain.
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Posted by
Doc Manhattan
under
General Stupidness
on Thu: 31-05-07 06:58 PM CDT |
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